Shark Bait movie review

MOVIE TITLE: Shark Bait

The movie is now playing in some theaters nationwide, but also on streaming at the same time.

Shark Week starts July 24 on the Discovery and Discovery+. Just saying.

RATING: PG-13

LENGTH: 1 hour 27 minutes

MOVIE REVIEW MOM GRADE: D+

IN A NUTSHELL:

A group of friends enjoying their Spring Break in some Spanish-speaking country, steal a couple of jet skis and race them out to sea while drunk. Yeah, good plan, knuckleheads! The result is a horrific head-on collision. They struggle to find a way home with a badly injured friend while sharks lurk in the waters below.

Requirements for a goofy shark movie:

Good-looking young adults in bathing suits
Lots of jump scares
People get chomped by sharks
The characters make a lot of dumb decisions

If that’s what you want, you’ll be satisfied enough with this action flick.

The film was directed by James Nun and written by Nick Saltrese.

THINGS I LIKED:

The action starts happening quickly at about 15 minutes into the movie. Yay. The first 15 minutes are spent watching the group of idiot partiers get so drunk that they’re sure to make really stupid decisions during the rest of the movie. And they do.
The cast includes Holly Earl, Jack Trueman, Catherine Hannay, Malachi Pullar-Latchman, and Thomas Flynn.
The original title of the movie was “Jetski”.
There is a scene that is an homage (or steal) from the movie JAWS, when someone is being eaten by a shark from the waist down.
The movie was actually shot in Malta, not Mexico.
I liked the drone shots from up above to get perspective on where the characters were and to visually see how truly far away they were from help.
The title gets its name from a line that one of the characters says.

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE:

There are so many bad acting moments that this movie will be watched just to laugh and have fun with it, but that’s a fun time too.
It’s filled with shark-movie tropes, but what did you expect? It’s a dumb shark movie!
All of the characters are jerks, except one, so we really don’t care too much whether they live or die.
The movie poster shows a brunette in a little red bikini, but we never see that in the actual movie.
The dialogue is pretty lame with sentences like, “Why?”
The screaming should have been more intense to be believable.
I could tell from the very beginning which characters would last longer than the others.
I thought the shark and wounds looked totally fake.

TIPS FOR PARENTS:

The movie starts with a slut twerking in front of a bunch of guys and lifting her shirt up. (We don’t actually see the nudity.)
Everyone boozes it up non-stop during their evening of fun, which extends into more booze for breakfast.
Guys steal some jet skis
A guy flips the bird.
Some Spanish is spoken at the beginning of the movie without subtitles. A man tells one of the girls in Spanish that a shark bit his legs off, so she needs to be careful and listen to his advice. A beach worker walks by where the partiers were the night before and, in Spanish, he says, “Animals.”
A good tip viewers learn is to not drink ocean water.
Cleavage and girls in bikinis
People die bloody deaths. We see bloody, dismembered bodies.