Show Dogs will test parents

Show Dogs Grade:   D for dumb

Rating: PG, 92 minutes

In a Nutshell: It’s a children’s movie about dogs that compete in a competition.  Young children will be amused, but it’s torture for almost everyone else.

Tips for parents: 

• One of the dogs is supposed to be a druggie, begging for catnip from another dog.
• No profanity, other than OMG.
• There is a reference to the Tom Hanks movie Turner & Hooch and Life of Pi that children won’t get at all.  Those are much better movies than this one.  One of the bloopers at the end of the movie refers to The LEGO Batman Movie.  Will Arnett’s voice was great in that one.
• A dog farts.  This is a kid’s movie after all.

Uplifting theme: 

• “I think everyone deserves to choose love for themselves.” – Will Arnett
• Friendship, loyalty
• Animal rights and protection
• Be proud to be yourself
• Appreciate that others see the world differently.
• A part from super predictable and prejudiced voice matches for the dogs, the movie is pretty harmless.

Things I liked:

• Some of the CGI is really good, but some of it is downright awful.  You can actually see when the CGI glitches.
• All of the real dogs are amazing and beautiful.
• Will Arnold is always funny.  I love him in pretty much anything he does.
• The cast includes the talented voices of Chris “Ludacris” Bridges, Stanley Tucci, Alan Cumming, Gabriel Iglesias, Deila Sheppard, and Andy Beckwith.
• I live in Las Vegas, so it’s always fun to see my city on the Big Screen.
• I have a Papillon, so I loved seeing one in the movie as the French dog coach.
• Super fake, but adorable panda bear.  I got to visit the Great Panda Base in Chengdu, China this year.  Pandas of all sizes everywhere.  So cute your head almost explodes.
• Natasha Lyonne cleans up nicely.  She is a criminal and total skank on the popular TV show Orange is the New Black.
• Karm, the dog, is voiced by Shaquille O’Neal!  I loved his dreadlocks and philosophy on life.  Pups for Peace.  Ha ha
• Keep watching during the closing credits for some bloopers.
• American Humane was in charge of monitoring the shooting of the film to ensure that no animals were harmed.

Things I didn’t like:

• The pigeons were super annoying.  Their voices were over-acted and their funny quips missed the mark.
• Most of the dialogue is super lame.
• The ending suggests a sequel.  Do we really want another one of these?
• It moves pretty slowly.
• It’s just not a very good movie.
• It always annoys me when scenes from the movie trailer don’t even appear in the actual movie.

Funny lines:

• “Who let the dogs out?” – bad guy who stole the panda bear
• “What kind of dog likes Hip Hop?” – Frank (Will Arnett)
• “There’s a lot more where that comes from.  Not a lot, but some.” – Frank (Will Arnett)

Interesting lines:

• “You only lose what you claim to.” – Aristotle

@trinaboice