The Flood movie review

MOVIE TITLE: The Flood

This disaster/survival movie is currently available to rent, purchase, or stream on platforms like Amazon, Apple iTunes, Microsoft Store, and Spectrum on Demand.

RATING: R

LENGTH: 1 hour 33 minutes

MOVIE REVIEW MOM GRADE: D for dumb

IN A NUTSHELL:

A daring jailbreak during a dangerous Louisiana hurricane is interrupted by a horde of large, hungry alligators.

This goofy action flick was directed by Brandon Slagle. Writing credits go to Chad Law and Josh Ridgway.

This is the kind of movie that’s so bad that you just might have fun watching it with your friends for some good laughs.

THINGS I LIKED:

The determined cast gives this creature feature a go and includes Casper Van Dien, Nicky Whelan, Louis Mandylor, Randy Wayne, Ryan Francis, Floyd Ferguson, and Eva Carter.
We get a quick look at a rap sheet for the criminals, letting us know they are hardened dudes.
I like how one of the characters made mention of Noah’s Flood to paint a picture of immense water.
Sometimes the alligators look real and vicious. Other times, the CGI looks super fake. Their tongues always look fake and weird.

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE:

The opening scene before the rolling credits was terrible with painful acting.
It’s hard to take a plastic sheriff seriously.
CGI rain.
We don’t learn anything about any of the characters, so we’re not invested enough to care whether or not any of them get eaten by alligators. What we do know about them is that they’re either dumb or criminal.
Most of the dialogue is just filled with macho growls and obscenities.
Super fake tattoo on Kim DeLonghi’s arm.
It’s so frustrating to watch dumb people make dumb decisions.
If man-eating creatures were in the water, I think I’d move a lot faster, eh? The alligators move slowly and so do the humans. The people rarely act with a sense of urgency. Why?
The people keep leaving the doors open, which is super convenient for the alligators.
There are many attempts at humor but most of them don’t work.
There’s a scene where an idiot tries to pat the alligator’s head and control it like a snake charmer. Yeah, that’s not going to work out well, ya think?
Super fake-looking blood and wounds.
Exciting fight sequences are when multiple people are attacking one individual, like in the John Wick movies. In this movie, the bad guys stand around and politely take turns.